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Sunday, June 18

happy father's day

1)Today is father's day, we are going to do what we have always been doing for years. Nothing.

Actually, i've totally forgotten abt it already, at least until late afternoon when i scaned through kids central and saw 'What are u doing on father's day?!' advertisement .
Initially, I found it rather strange why he only went off work on the afternoon and not the usual early morning, perhaps he was waiting for some surprise happy father's day lunch or something. But no, no one even rmb.

Just ordered some good food, i ate almost the entire piece of large pizza. Everyone was there, except him of course.

2)I found myself almost losing my temper, just so close to losing it.

Noticed from time to time, i've been typing such long and hard to read things into my blog, actually it is to keep on reminding myself.

IT is just like holding sand, it slips away slowly drip by drip over time.
Then when its empty, u will have to go through the cycle again just to scoop another handful of it.

I just want to keep this powerful feeling within me, i dont want to lose it again.

3) There is less than 1 month till my birthday.
There is not much time left that i can still be at my 'teens'. I can say that this period is my last chance to be willful, stubborn, irresponsible, childish and selfish.

jy was half right when she said i mentioned too much 'i' in my blog. She was the only person who noticed that (and also the frightening expression of me with my hand on the mouth taken by yc). She was wrong abt the overly self confidence part.

The thing is i'm just being plain selfish. Just like him. Everything is abt myself. 'I'. I reasoned that i can only help others if i can help myself in the first place.

I'm always rushing for time, as there seriously isn't much time for me to lose. Please forgive my last burst and chance of willfulness.

All i wanted is to end my life as a teen this way.
i want to rmb my life as a teen to be so, with no regret.

|[ zofz | 7:44 PM ]|